Thursday, September 3, 2015

I Am - Inspired by Novel & Talib Kweli (Happy Birthday Novel)

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Black @zz Pot Calling The Kettle Crazy


I don't know about you, but if I had a dime for how many script flipping treacherous people I have ran across, I would be on a private island somewhere sipping tea with Kermit The Frog and his new muppet girlfriend.

I reconnected with an old friend after what we called a "group" friendship imploded.  I was very happy to see the friend and had swept a lot of mess under the rug.  I guess the friend would be remiss, if they didn't mention that another friend in the circle thought I was "Bat $H!t Crazy".  If you ask me about my crazy, I will often laugh and tell you I am down right certifiable, but coming from this source, the audacity really cooked my sauce.

I removed a lot of judgement to even associate with this female as she was a friend of a friend.  (You know how that goes).  This is a female who is a single mother of a son who curses, is disobedient as hell, all over the place, and gets the pleasure of hearing his Mother curse and pollute his brain with how messed up his Daddy is.  This is the same female who couldn't hold it together and put her child first at HIS birthday party because she wanted to pop off at his Daddy.  Now Pause --- I have sat at a birthday party for my son with his father AND THE WOMAN HE CHEATED ON ME WITH on top of abandoning his son when he was fighting for his life in ICU for this woman.  As a woman and an unselfish Mother, I kept my peace and my focus was on my son.  A real woman puts her child first, but HEY -- I didn't judge you.

Too many times this scatterbrained broad proved that she "Aint My Type of Hype" yet still received the benefit of my own benevolence when her own friends were calling her crazy behind her back.  I supported her business ventures, I visited her, and when her closest friend was trashing her for filth and hell bent on leaving her out of events, I remained impartial and fair.  What pisses me off about people and especially this chick is the fact that her life is a complete shamble, but she feels she is majorly qualified to talk about me.  So let's run this down on paper:

  • She has no man and is quick to get the liquor in her system and go full out hoe at a moment's notice
  • She decides to start a business but got shirts with the letters peeling off and not even a business card
  • She constantly is being taken care of by her friends but never seems to have the capacity to return it
  • She has zero business savvy, common sense, and didn't even have $10 to support her OWN friend's performance at FSO (yeah, I paid for her entry).

Her last act of foolishness was calling me over a situation where she knows one side of the story from another LIAR.  This was a business situation that she had no involvement and no information with.  Peep her decision making...She is in the car on the way to take one of our friends to IDENTIFY THE BODY OF HIS LOVED ONE THAT HAS PASSED AWAY.  While she is on the phone, I have no idea that this has transpired, but she chooses to argue about small stuff to which she has no credible information about.  When I find out hours later that my dear friend had died, I cannot lie - I was ready to rip her head from her body and drop kick it over the nearest goal post.  Who does that?

Of course at no point in time does she admit any wrong doing and for a long time I knew if I laid eyes on her I'd probably catch a charge.  After a lot of soul searching, I decided to forgive for me and although I hadn't done this heffa harm, I took accountability and apologized for the part I played in our arguments.  I picked up the phone like a WOMAN and called.  I got voicemail and left a message.  Again, this tacky heffa responds with a TEXT MESSAGE: "I got your message and if I have done anything to hurt you, I apologize." -- IF YOU HAVE DONE ANYTHING?  Okay girl.

Currently, she is sitting under the tailbone of the female who did her best to poison people's mind about her, criticized her parenting (instead of helping her), and planted seeds that she was a crazy liar who attacks people with knives and then lies about the fact that she was physically abused.  Additionally, this is the same chick that when a NEW chick came into the fold, she took up with her and they both dogged you and talked about you...but hey - You're a GREAT judge of character right?

So, in short, I spilled this story and came at it just as if we were sitting together in my living room sipping on tea or wine.  It is important that you really size up your detractors and determine if they are even qualified to enter in an opinion on you.  Do not let someone visibly broken try to size you up for chinks in your armor.  All I know is I don't need grown men to take care of me, cook for me, care for my child, and do my hair.  The same grown men that you didn't hang with at all when there was a rift in the group, but when the paradigm shifted and you found yourself OUT, you were over their house EVERYDAY.  Now that one of them needs you - you are nowhere to be found.  Big surprise.  (Not really).

So babes, I will continue on my BAT $hit crazy journey with my HUSBAND (that you don't have), my HOUSE (that you don't have and can't afford), Friends (that don't tell my business to anyone who listens and peppers it with judgement), my business (that I have ran for years while you can't even get a decent shirt made where the letters don't peel off), and my independence.  I can do my own hair, makeup, care for my kids, register my business, make business cards, and draw up proposals while you remain clueless about everything around you.  My children will grow knowing they have an unselfish Mother who knows how to put them first and compose herself.  People think your son is cute as a button, but BAD AS HELL.  The poor baby is just a reflection of his BAT $H!T crazy and clueless MOTHER.  ...but wait...I'm the crazy one? I guess girl.

**My loves, sometimes you can't sugar coat it.  Sometimes it is not about the diplomatic and politically correct way to say things.  These are real situations that happen to real people and while I can give a scholarly and positive dissertation on the trials of life, sometimes I just have to bring it down to the level and say - I suffer just like you.  I more than likely have the same passing thoughts you do.  I do not always handle things perfectly at it's inception, but I am introspective, and if it means enough, I will attempt to recover the situation.

In short -- some people are ignorant and you are well within your right to say.."I forgive you, but F* you...sincerely."**


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Wednesday, September 2, 2015

What In SamsClubHell is a ScrapWig?

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If We Must Die '09 - PhillyzJamPoet Artistic Commentary on Racism

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Tuesday, September 1, 2015

Open Spoken Letter To Missy Elliott

Open Spoken Letter to Missy Elliott
Dear Miss E,

A lot of rappers come and go

but they all seem to miss me
They don’t touch me, you feel me?
They don’t feel me, 
so really
these 5 senses sense the fact that mute desires
disallow me to speak you
Do the math class
Missy came out greater than, the common man
and to this day NO EQUAL
No prequels or sequels, she stands alone as Mr. Holland’s Opus
out of my boombox speaker, the dopeness
sits on her vocal chords with double dutch as the focus
with the same turn of phrase around the way girls turn rope with
Miss E is every element that makes up WHOA.
All you gotta say is Missy Elliott. GO!
and she’ll sum up everything you know
in a sum of all flows, legendary, classic, and soon to be
Word is bond you speak the gospel
and those who seek the real are your people
Sitting on the Summit of the Church’s Steeple
the higher power, hits you with the highest of fives to tag you in
clue you in, on this world we live in
blood of the holy ghost fills your pen
as your BIC serves as a lit wick
a live grenade with a pulled Clip
Writing on the wall and Egypt’s hieroglyph 
She’s one of the wonders of the world
Wonder Woman who inspired the Beautiful minds of Wonderful girls
9th & Stevie Wonder how this self made pearl
Transformed from a grain of sand
Out of captivity, busted open the clam
Decided not to sink, she cemented the sand
in order to stand on the world’s greatest stage
just to talk to the players
Miss E. The lyrical Soothsayer
Missy the walking dead & Vampire slayer
Has always been brilliant in the light
Simultaneously a day walker and Queen of the night
She is something special to behold
Earned her stripes she too sings America 
She does it for all our Langston “Hues”
She’s Harlem Renaissance and Miss Ceily Blues
She’s The Color Purple and a Royal Point of View
The Princess Di of our hip hop
The lucky 7 on the di the hip hop
She’s Brown Suga on the corner that we cop
new and old hip hop spinning on a cardboard box
in the borough of Brooklyn
She’s the clash of two titans out of the borough of Brooklyn
she’s Juicy and reasonable doubt
she’s ETHER and No DOUBT
and I’ll rock with that all day long
She’s Semper Fidelis and Army strong
she’s air force fly, and Cool water gone
She’s not just the General, but the whole damn Navy
She’s the biscuit, the sop, and of course the gravy
she’s a sophisticated complex FIRST lady
with a head of state’s  mind
She’s Misdemeanor of the most notorious kind
but can’t be defined by the masses
Mista soul and blackberry molasses
Heatwave, Spinner, and Adidas Classic
She’s a beast, call her REX JURASSIC
and although her arms are too short to box with OZ
she and the higher power are never at odds
she’s the lullaby that rocked baby girl’s boat 
before she sent back to GOD
with the flysheet pair of wings any angel has ever seen
Mountain High, and River Deep
She’s the wake up in yo cut, Janet Jack’s NO SLEEP
Misdemeanor turns to Miss Tina, turning turntables that turns out arenas

Missy, Missed her, leaner 
Misty Mr. Meaner
Misty Blue Steamer
This is my ode
a letter
to the Don Diva.

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Wednesday, June 24, 2015

Understanding PhillyzJamPoet

If you are curious about what makes  Here are two key things you need to know:

I am a Libra
I am an Empath

I fit these descriptions to almost an absolute bullseye.  I've known all my life that these factors made me stick out and so my expectation never was to FIT IN.

Thank you for this insight as this is who I am to the core.  Perhaps people who KNOW OF me and/or KNOW me can gain a little more perspective on what goes on inside me.

Libra Traits

The people born under the Sign Libra are kind, gentle and lovers of beauty, harmony and peace. However, in their effort to keep everyone happy, they find it difficult to say ‘NO’ to anyone, and as a result, they end up getting stressed.

The Libra-born natives are experts at getting things done, but they cannot be called cunning. They are too good to exploit the emotions of other people.
Their ruling planet is Venus, and they are extremely romantic people. Whatever they do in life is driven by the feelings of love. 
They have a very pleasing manner of talking and also choose pleasant subjects to talk about, which makes people feel happy in their company. 
They have a strong sense of justice and fair play. They may skilfully find their way out, but they will never resort to cunning methods to get what they want. 
They are well-known for their diplomatic skills and have the ability to listen to differing points of view with a great deal of patience. 

Negative Traits

The Scales, though mostly energetic, can sometimes be lazy and may tend to take things easy. It is not physical laziness, but they wish to avoid any kind of stress or emotional challenges. 
One of the most difficult things for a Libra is to take a decision. When faced with a choice, it is very tough for them to select what is best for them, which can become a big hurdle in their path. 
Because they have a strong desire for material comforts, they may tend to waste a lot of money in unnecessary luxuries. 
People born under the Zodiac Sign Libra are firm and strong, but they can also be detached and pretend to be pleasant sometimes as they don’t wish to displease anyone.

Empath’s are unique personality types, their sensory levels are always on high alert, they are incredibly intuitive and their awareness and sensitivity to the energy levels that vibrate around them are extremely high.

If an empath senses something, they are not often wrong. If they think someone’s lying or that something is just “not right” you can bet your last dollar that they are not wrong.
Therefore, a basic understanding of this mystical and quite magical creature is highly beneficial.
Empaths have quite a few little quirks, traits and characteristics that are worth knowing about, and gaining a better understanding of, so that any relationship that is formed has a strong survival chance and also so that it thrives.
Empaths can be deeply misunderstood. It can take a little time to get to know them before they fully unravel and until their true magnificent spirit receives the opportunity to shine.
Love with an empath will be intense as they are energetically sensitive, therefore they will pick up on everything and anything that is happening around them. Regardless of whether emotions have been outwardly expressed, empaths will experience their partner’s emotions as deeply as they feel their own.
It is impossible to try to hide true feelings when romantically involved with an empath as they will likely have figured them out long before the person feeling them has. Empaths are highly intuitive yet sometimes fail to trust their inner voice as too many people have previously tried to wrongly convince them that their gut feelings were wrong.

Being a little naïve and trusting at times, the empath has doubted themselves and pushed aside their intuition, causing them to lose faith in the power they hold within that alerts them to any perceived signs of danger. That being said, the little nagging voice in the empath’s head will not subside until the reality and truth has been fully uncovered.
Empaths like truth. However hard it is to handle, they would rather be told things straight than told a lie, even if it is a white one. Although the truth isn’t always pretty, it is much nicer than spending days and nights trying to make sense of all the complicated energies and subliminal messaging systems that are going on.
If it’s one thing that empaths are amazing at it is dealing with a brutally raw and honest relationship. Although they can be rather delicate creatures on some levels, their strength in relationships is found where honesty, trust and loyalty come before anything else.
Empaths can be perceived as having hearts that are caged in. Although, this is only true when they have been deceived so many times they feel that their only option is protection. The true spirit of an empath wants to give and receive love in abundance, though they are only able to do this when they feel safe and secure that they are in a safe place to open the door and allow the love to flow.
One of the most tragic parts about the empaths character is that all too often the love is cast out in all the wrong places. Empaths feel the pain and sorrow of the whole world and feel that they want to heal and fix the world up and make things better for all concerned. This can be an amazingly powerful thing and this energy is exactly what the world needs. However, this can also be a deeply painful way to exist.
Not everyone sees the world the way an empath views it and because of this, an empath’s heart will be broken constantly and they will bleed endlessly for cruelty, injustice and inequalities. There will be many who will want to take the love, affection and the empath’s good nature with no care for giving any return.
Whilst this can teach an empath a lot about unconditional love and also an immense amount about self-preservation, it is also a deeply painful learning process.
An empath will fail to understand why others do not give out care, consideration and affection freely and why other people can so easily turn a blind eye to heartbreak and suffering when healing is what is required. Others may ridicule and belittle the empaths desire to reach out and make a difference, and this serves to add salt to their wounds.
When an empath feels hurt, what they need most is loving support and understanding so that they know they are not alone in wanting to use some of their powerful energy to heal and make changes in the world; if they receive this from a partner, a bond for life will very likely form.
Empaths will fall into the hands of those who want to take advantage of their somewhat naïve and caring nature. Again, this is another sharp lesson and one that can cause an empath to develop a sense of mistrust and what leads to protecting their emotions with barriers and brick walls.
It can also lead to an empath to feelings of unworthiness and also low-self esteem, as once they have depleted their energy reserves to such a low level by giving and not understanding how to protect themselves in the process, they can end up with a broken heart and with very little faith in mankind.
It is not in an empaths nature to take, they only know how to give, so to ensure the relationship is one of balance and is also harmonious, ensure the empath is shown love in the form of actions, so that the circle of love flows freely. Words will mean little to an empath, unless they are followed through. Their intuition will quickly pick up on something done with poor intent, or if a person’s words are inauthentic.
To love someone who is an empath means to recognise that they thrive when the flames are turned up, not down. An empath gives off a powerful and energetic fuel of love, light and radiance, though the fire only fully rages when an empath exists in a sacred place within which they feel secure enough to glow.
Empaths are soft, delicate and immensely vulnerable creatures on the inside, although, once burnt, on the outside they can appear incredibly strong. Once bitten, twice shy where an empath is concerned, they find it very difficult to forget deep wounds and to continue a relationship once foundations are rocked.
The best way to fully connect with an empath is by creating a safe and solid platform to build a future upon. If cracks appear through mistrust and deceit, it can become immensely difficult to repair them. Empaths thrive on trust, loyalty and dependability. Show them these things and the relationship will be very difficult to break.
As empaths are highly passionate people, they will often find a strong connection to a hobby or interest that others will find impossible to penetrate. Due to their creative side, they may find a resonance with music, dance, writing, art, activism, reading, Yoga, meditation, humanitarian causes or other similar interests. Whatever it is that has captured the mind of an empath will be become sacred in their hearts.
Empaths will immerse themselves in their hobbies and lose themselves completely and sometimes this can feel as though their interests are the only things that matter to them. Although they will have a deep attachment to their passions, it is far easier to understand that an empath loves all things at great levels of intensity and they need outside interests to survive and feel alive, this can sometimes be difficult for others to understand.
Space, plenty of space, and freedom to explore and submerge in their chosen activity is the easiest way to deal with this. Asking an empath to choose may not give the desired outcome that would be hoped for. The heart quickly gets connected to passionate interests, and once that connection has been made, the heart will be break if it has to be severed.
Respect and understanding for another’s alone time can make or break a relationship with an empath. An empath will not want or expect anyone else to dive as deeply into their interests as they do, however, an understanding that their interests are significantly important can really make life a whole lot easier.
There is no need to feel ostracised or unwelcome, while there’s a little chance an empath will let you fully in to their special interest, it is far more likely they will gain more pleasure when they are wrapped up in it by themselves. This is not selfish or inconsiderate, it is just simply how the empath’s heart and spirit operate.
If they have a connection to something, it is intense and they will very likely wish to delve as deeply into it as is possible. Passions are a great energy release and empaths will possibly feel as though they zone-out while immersed, and they will very likely lose all track of time. Allow them to take pleasure in it, and with the free time this has created, take up interests separately rather than allowing resentment or frustration to build.
It possibly won’t last for too long, as empaths are known to move quickly from one interest to another once the initial burning desire of connection eventually simmers down.
As empaths are sensitive to energy, their worst-case scenarios are confrontations and aggressive situations. Although under normal circumstances they are one of the least violent and aggressive characters, they can very easily lose their self-control if they become absorbed in the negative and toxic energy that surrounds them. Empaths are fight or flight characters who more often than not, will prefer to take flight and remove themselves from the weight that the energy is bearing down on them.
If situations like this occur regularly, it can eventually lead empaths to become introverted and homebodies as they prefer the safety of their own environment where they are not subjected to the rise and fall of other people’s energies. After attending any kind of social situation, they will need downtime to recharge and to balance out their own energy fields.
Places such as supermarkets, nightclubs, the cinema or anywhere where there is a large crowd of people, will be very draining for an empath. They are very sensitive to light and sound, so these things can also have a detrimental and draining effect on an empath’s psyche. An empath will likely need to hold on to their partner’s hand or arm during such occasions, finding that their partner’s energy forms a soothing welcome block and temporary release from the energies that surround.
After attending any social function an empath may feel completely drained and the effects can be temporarily debilitating, meaning that all an empath will want to do is sleep or rest, possibly alone, until the absorbing effects of the occasion have worn off.
All in all, it will take a very secure, confident and balanced person to form a solid mutually beneficial and rewarding relationship with an empath. The empath personality type is a unique and extremely enchanting gift to the world. As long as their wings are not clipped, and they have the freedom and space to fly, it has the opportunity to be a deeply rewarding, incredibly loving and spiritually awakening relationship for both involved.
A connection with an empath can be a blessing and one of the greatest gifts from the universe as it offers the opportunity to look at the world through the lens of a kaleidoscope. Everything that may have once seemed normal for a relationship will be turned upside down as a new understanding and perspective is learned and the unconscious mind is preened open.
At times it may feel like being in the company of a magically gifted being who has special powers that we have been led to believe do not exist within humans. This can be both a blessing and a curse. Nothing will get past an empath as they see, feel and connect with everything at all times.
The one thing I would strongly recommend is to peel back all the layers that society labels as “norms,” “standards” and “expectations.” We are then free to discover a brand new way of existing; giving and receiving unconditional love, being fully alive in the moment, connecting deep within the core of our primal being and reigniting all the superpowers that are inherent within man.
A relationship with an empath can lead to uncovering special gifts such as intuition, energy awareness, deep connection and a brand new level of understanding the fellow man without the need for speech. All the things the modern world has tried, for far too long, to convince us we should deny.
True love can be a very difficult thing for an empath to achieve, although with the right person, with someone understanding, grounded, free spirited and trustworthy, love can be an intimate, deeply bonding, healing, fulfilling, empowering and healthy addiction that neither will want to break.

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